I normally do not post something like this but I want to let others see what I have to deal with and I am pretty sure there are other parents with Aspie children going through similar situations. The ignorance this parent showed needs to change.
Yesterday afternoon I had the displeasure of having to tell my son he is no longer allowed to play with one of his friends. He is not allowed to leave our yard and if other neighborhood kids are playing with this specific child he is not allowed to play the neighborhood kids at that time.
I’m done with the drama from this child’s mother. I am done with all of the accusations…do I think my son is innocent and a complete angel….NO. Do I believe something happened …YES. Do I have the full story…NO. Why was your son not there to explain what happened? These are some of the answers I could tell you were wanting to hear but when you keep on making comments about “You’re lucky you’re NOT my son”….and “Zachary is crazy”……NO he is not your son he is MINE and NO he is NOT crazy he has a disability.
There is a difference and your ignorance of such needs to change. First of all we need to get a few things straight. A disability like Aspergers Syndrome is defined as by the National Institute of Neurological Disorders and Stroke as: “Asperger syndrome (AS) is an autism spectrum disorder (ASD), one of a distinct group of complex neurodevelopment disorders characterized by social impairment, communication difficulties, and restrictive, repetitive, and stereotyped patterns of behavior.”
So for you to stand there and tell me and my child he is crazy is beyond absurd. You have to see a child with special needs like this on all different levels. You have to see this child on a personal level and without any judgments. When it comes to finding out what happened there are 3 sides to a story. Your child’s side, my child’s side and in between the two is the truth. Unless we were specifically there to hear it then we would know exactly what went down but since he was not here to tell his side…I will only know my son’s story and will have to deal with this situation the best I can.
Now let me tell you something else….KNOWLEDGE IS POWER. So here is some information about me and being a parent to a child with a disability. I will have a occasional drink. When I have an issue with another child and go to approach a parent to work things out I do not bring alcohol with me. I do not bring a posse of people with me either. I bring my child and my husband.
Yes I do have a lot of patience with my special needs children. Getting angry over things they do does not help in any situation…sure it may be a temporary way for me to relieve my frustration but in the end it gets me no where with them. Physically punishing my children does not accomplish anything either. You have to work smarter to get results. A child with Asperger’s are unable to process the consequences of their behavior and have difficulty understanding social expectations.
So I now know what my purpose is …my job is to teach others about persons with Asperger’s Syndrome and their families. Each family is unique in their own structure as is their Aspie child(ren).