I’m back…….

I had to take a break from blogging for a while.  I am dealing with health issues that are very real and scary.  The biggest part of being scared is knowing that if I do not change me and my life that I will not be here to see my children become amazing adults and have families of their own.  

I have previously stated about wanting to have some type of bariatric surgery.  I was really wanting to have a sleeve done but with health insurance being what it is, there was nothing like that in my future.  Now I am telling you this because in May I was at my heaviest ever 363 lbs, my blood pressure was on the rise and had become a diabetic.  I would fall asleep in my recliner in the middle of the day for no reason and I had no motivation.

When I finally was able to meet my primary care physician, the time had come.  I was at the point to  become accountable for me and my actions.  I was so over seeing others being successful at their weight loss because of the surgery and knew it was my turn to do what I needed.  So at this appointment the doctor recommended me to join weight watchers. I did what he recommended.

I was anxious to say the least on that first day.  I left the house early to find the meeting.  With mapquest being mapquest it took me on a round about way to discover a city I knew nothing about.  I was so upset by the time I found the meeting place…I was crying.  The  tears streaming down my face just made me even more mad because now I was late.

I put my big girl pants on and walked in.  I felt very uneasy upon entering the door.  Building up enough courage to stand on a weight scale ,letting a complete stranger see what I weighed.   Not knowing if I was being judged .    Little did I know that is not at all going on.  I have found my place to be.  I have become more relaxed and able to open up to the strangers I sit among.   Each one of us have an issue and it is with food.

I have always heard that admitting to a problem is the first step in recovery.   I now know it is true.  The problem I have with food is the potatoes, rice and pasta.   Not getting in any type of exercise is right up there too.   So I have made an attempt to correct both situations.  I am now tracking what I eat.  I am very mindful of what I am putting into my mouth.  We have also made a purchase of an elliptical.  Because of other health issues, my orthopedic doctor told me for exercise it should be either a stationary bike, elliptical or swimming pool.  Well I definitely can not afford a swimming pool.  We happened to go into the local Walmart and low and behold up in front of the cash registers was a line of exercise equipment they had clearenced out.  They had $577 elliptical marked down to $225 and the paper attached said “ADDITIONAL 50% OFF AT REGISTER”.  I was totally astonished.   So we bought said elliptical.  It is on our back porch and I walk 10 mins a day for 4 days a week.  I am working my way up.

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Since May I have gone down 29.5 lbs.  I can not see it myself but hopefully in the near future I will.

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