Just one step……

I normally do not like to write about myself…I have a self-image problem.  I don’t like the way I look.  I am not comfortable in my own body.  This has been an issue with me since high school.  Whether being tormented in school to the nasty looks by strangers in the store…I have become very self conscious. I am always the one taking the pictures of friends and family not in them.

I have learned to laugh at myself  and others as a way to avoid the issue of my self image.  Since having to quit working 6 years ago my weight hit an all time high, the blood pressure was up and had been diagnosed as “diabetic.”  At the age of 46, my two youngest brothers are learning to live with diabetes and the other brother is facing back surgery where they will be fusing his back together.    My mother has survived stage 2 breast cancer  now 6 years and a mastectomy.

When I went to the doctor every time I could feel my blood pressure rising and just not feel good.  Falling asleep in the recliner in the afternoon had become the norm for me.  Well enough was enough….the doctor and I came up with a plan for me.  He felt like it would be in my best interest to have bariatric surgery to help me.  He suggested I start weight watchers and come back monthly for follow ups.

I began seeing an endocrinologist because I was diagnosed with Hashimoto’s Disease.  As defined by the Mayo Clinic “Hashimoto’s disease is a condition in which your immune system attacks your thyroid, a small gland at the base of your neck below your Adam’s apple”.  My thyroid medicine over the years went from the tiniest amount possible to almost 300 mcg per day.  I still had no motivation and still falling asleep in the afternoon.  Soon after seeing the new endocrinologist I began Victoza to help with my A1C.  I started weight watchers…every Saturday morning.

Well part of the program is making time for me and just doing it for me.  Whether its having a pedicure done or coloring or just taking time for myself without the husband and kids.  I consider Weight watchers my “me time”.  I leave the house before 9 and get home after 10.  There I sit with others who are also dealing with the struggle of weight  and weight loss.  We have a common bond and no one judges me on how I look or what I have done.  Crane’s Roost Park is a large 1-mile walking path around a man-made pond behind a local mall.  Well this girl right here and her sister-in-law, Rachael and her brother Andy walked the WHOLE ENTIRE THING!!!!  This is a big deal for me because normally I would make excuses to stop every chance I could  and today I did not….the breeze was nice.  So nice that I am going back tomorrow to do it again.

I won a magnet that says ” A journey of a thousand miles begins with just one step.”.. How true it is …..this is just one “big step” for me in a battle.

life-message

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